The uber-talented cast and crew, Joss’ genius, extremely relatable characters that become your friends, wonderful mythology, sassiness and humour, drama and heartbreak, lessons I’ve learnt and tears I’ve shed and all the things that made me think, made me laugh and made me thank all gods in heaven for the moment I decided to start watching it.
But what I basically told Sarah and James was: “Play the romance. Be proud of him. Love him when you say you love him. Love her when you say she doesn’t love you. Forget about the crumbling world. For that period of time, it doesn’t exist.” - Joss Whedon
Seeing as it will be my birthday on Monday, I thought I would do a reflective post for you all.
I have changed a whole lot in the past couple years. To show you I’m going to tell you what my life was like/what I was like a couple years ago..
I was best friends with literally the 2 worst people on the planet who convinced me to drink to drown the pain of liking a guy who led me on one night despite the fact that he knew how I felt about him. I craved drama and loved gossiping with those same 2 best friends. I dated guy after guy to fill the hole in my heart due to endless loneliness my whole life. I dated a guy who physically abused me and forced himself on me several times. I hated school so much that I would fake sick constantly so I wouldn’t have to go to class. (I passed those classes but barely). I loved theatre but I didn’t believe in myself because of people telling me that I was never going to make it.
And since then…
I have completely broken ties with those 2 people. I have stopped talking to that stupid guy who led me on. I do not drink and plan on never drinking for the rest of my life. (I don’t care if other people drink, it just isn’t a good thing for me to do because of my depression/anxiety problems, etc.). I stopped dating guy after guy and waited for the right one (Roy) and now we’ve been married for 4 months. I do not crave drama. I am going back to school after taking a year off (in that year I thought I would go to AMDA but I am now getting an actual degree instead so I can teach acting classes while also performing in new york. I think i needed that year..that year made me realize what I really wanted to do with school. And getting a degree is something I want, so I can teach people the joys of theatre, as well as perform). I believe in myself and know that I can make it in theatre. I have grown immensely as a performer (especially acting). I am living with my parents so I can save money for New York (some people see living with their parents as lazy but I see it as making a smart financial decision so I can achieve my dreams.) While some things are still uncertain (like Roy finding a job and such), I’m not worried because I love my life now and I love the person I’ve become. I do not take crap from anyone anymore. I am confident. I am determined. I choose my friends wisely. I have made amends with some of my former enemies (who I should have never been enemies with) and now we are great friends. I am happy. I am learning to worry less and trust God more. I stand up for myself and if those 2 ex-friends ever said anything to myself I would definitely be brave enough now to defend myself. I am a stronger more mature person now. And no one can take that away from me.